The Fox and the Swine (Fisch, Kazooie)

[Fox McCloud]

The alleyway was damp and dripping, the darkness casting its own shadows in the night. His eyes glowed with whatever light they could find, giving him enough to see by as he made his way down backstreets and hidden roads. Tonight... was not a business night. Tonight, he just wanted to get away from it all.

But unfortunately for him, it was much too hard for a person of his... class to do so.

"Hey, you!"

The sound of a police man calling his name had Fox growling under his breath, and he slowly turned to look the man in the eyes. He hated them, he did; always calling him for no reason. Even when he wasn't doing anything bad. Still, he gave a coy smile. "Problem, officer?" he asked, his accent tilting the words in an odd fashion that obviously had the man squirming.

"There's a curfew in order. Anyone whose passports aren't--"

"Stepping off, piglet." To his surprise and pleasure, the police officer actually stepped away, possibly in fear. A newbie, obviously, though something... something about that should have bothered him, he realized. He just couldn't quite place what. "Passport is in order. Fox is allowing to be out."

And then it hit him.

New swine were never sent out alone. New swine always had old swine to guide them.

[Officer Fisch Grayson]

Officer Fisch Grayson wasn't far behind the new guy. He was taking the rookie on patrol in his new ride, a large police van. The back was a cage, taking up from behind the front seat, and ending at the back hatch itself. The cage was divided in two. On one side, it was empty, with benches for anyone they bring in. On the other, was Bruce, a very large, aggressive chain chomp.

On his belt, Fisch now had a special remote with two buttons. One opened Bruce's hatch. The other made a high-pitched sound, calling Bruce to his location. His pokeballs now stayed at home, so as not to draw suspicion to him being Navy.

Fisch stepped out from the shadows, behind the Immigrant. "There a problem?" he asked firmly. "More importantly, you got a reason to be out past curfew? Don't take it out on us. We don't make the rules."

[Fox McCloud]

Fox let out a yip of surprise and anger, fur standing on end as he turned to face the more experienced "law enforcement". "You are ambushing Fox?" he growled, spitting at the man's feet. "Dirty move, even for swine.

"Not needing reason for walking."

He reached into his coat pocket, fingertips gently touching the handle of his blaster for comfort. At least, if it came down to it, he would have something to defend himself with. His eyes shifted back and forth, from cop to cop.

"You are leaving Fox alone now, piglets. I making no trouble if you are going."

[Officer Fisch Grayson]

"Roberts, head back to the van. I'll handle this." The rookie nodded and obeyed. "All my partner did was ask a question. You're the one that took offense, I just took the necessary means of action. Dirty? All we're doing is following the rules, Pup."

He had his hand at his side, not on his gun, no. It was on the remote. "I don't want any trouble, either. But this Kingdom still has rules. You're out past curfew, and for that, Daddy's gotta scold you." He smirked. He didn't particularly like this part of the job, but one could get a little high off of the authority every now and then.

[Fox McCloud]

Fox snarled.

The gentle touch on his blaster became a tight grip, and his pointer finger itched at the trigger. "Letter one, proper term is being kit," the anthro growled, taking a step towards the officer. His hand, along with the gun, began to slide out of his coat. "Letter two, only dirty swine like yourself be sneaking up on someone who is being unarmed.

"However..." Here, he pulled it out all the way. The metal gleamed, even in the dim lighting. "...I am not being completely unarmed. You find that I be cheating. Just like kit, yes?" The display of a toothy grin was unmistakable.

---

((HE'S NOT GETTING NUMBERS CONFUSED WITH THE ALPHABET.
HE... HE JUST DOESN'T KNOW WHAT THE LETTERS ARE CALLED.

THOUGHT I'D CLEAR THAT UP.))

[Officer Fisch Grayson]

"Letter A, I didn't sneak up on you. I was patrolling deeper in the alley. [i}B[/i], I'm pretty sure chihuahuas have pups." He whipped out his own gun. "See, up until now I was just gunna make you sing the alphabet then we both go on our way. But you cheated. But you forget I have a gun too. And the fastest trigger finger on the force."

Okay so the last one was a bluff. "Now, you either put the gun down and we can go on our way. Or I can blow your head off. OR, if you don't like those...I got a new...partner...nearby. Now, I've always wondered what kind of damage a Chain Chomp can cause, exactly. But I've never actually seen it first-hand..."

[Fox McCloud]

Fox snarled again, but he knew at this point he was beaten. He was both outnumbered and outclassed, and there was only one way out of a situation like this...

"Fox is running now," he muttered under his breath.

He fired a couple blaster shots near Fisch's feet just to distract him, purposely aiming so that he would NOT hit the other man, then took off into a breakneck sprint. He had always been one of the faster ones in his group of comrades, and so it wasn't long before he was out of sight and (hopefully) out of mind.

---

It was a half an hour or so later. Fox hadn't stopped once, not even to rest, and by now he was more then a bit winded. He didn't even really know where he was any more, though he was sure he could find his way back to Krystal and the children when it came time for him to go home. For now, he just needed to be sure he was free of the piglets.

He was running through yet another alley, when all of a sudden he wasn't upright anymore; he was toppling, falling over, and when he finally kissed the pavement he skidded a ways, momentum still carrying him.

The anthro groaned.

He pushed himself up, looking for whatever the hell he had tripped over. "What the..."

[Kazooie]

Fisch jumped when his feet were fired at, firing a blind shot in Fox's direction. When he'd come back to his senses, he fired three more, but they did nothing more than make contact with a dumpster, wall, and the like. He cursed under his breath and headed back to the van. It wasn't worth the time.

---

Kazooie was resting, curled up in her tattered backpack, sleeping in the company of haunting and depressing dreams. As she always was. Suddenly, the red-crested Breegull felt a sharp pain in her back, like she'd been kicked.

The bag flew open, and she popped out, standing at her full five-foot nothing. s her eyes made contact with the fox who tripped over her, she wasn't very happy, as noted by her ruffled feathers and that crazed look in her eye. Wait...she always looked like that...

She stormed over. "Vhat's the big idea?" she squawked in her German-esque accent.

[Fox McCloud]

As soon as a bird appeared in front of him, he knew that he had probably knocked over a nest, or some sort of home, in his rush to get away from the authorities. Fox's ears pinned back; he hadn't meant to mess with anyone's home. That was something no one in the underground was supposed to do.

Your home was your sanctuary.

"Appologizing!" Fox said quickly in his own Russian-esque accent, shaking his head. His ears twitched again. "Fox was not seeing you. I am meaning no harm, see?"

[Kazooie]

"I know, you vur in a 'urry, didn't see zhe backpack I call 'ome. Kicked me right in the ass vhen I vas sleeping," she spoke calmly, though still obviously irritated.

"Tell you vhat. You seem like decent fellow, so I forgive you. Zhis time. Vhat's a car chasah like you doing in zhis part of zhe neighborhood? I know every face zhat goes in und out of 'ere. You I 'ave nevah seen before."

[Fox McCloud]

". . .You seem like decent fellow, so I forgive you. Zhis time."

"Thanking you," Fox muttered, pushing himself up so that he was on his feet once again. He brushed the dust and grime from his coat and shirt; a gesture he really only did for himself. Even as an animal, he still felt he had to be clean.

"Vhat's a car chasah like you doing in zhis part of zhe neighborhood?. . .You I 'ave nevah seen before."

The anthro cocked one brow. "I am being canine, yes, but Fox is not being dog. Fox is being... fox. Uncreative parents." He let that sink in, as he was starting to get tired of people calling him a dog, then stretched. "I am getting away from dirty pigs, is why I am in hurry," he said, finally replying to her question. "Hyrulian rule over police force is starting to get very tiring..."

[Kazooie]

"I am being canine, yes, but Fox is not being dog. Fox is being... fox. Uncreative parents."

"Zhat ist vhat I call all canine. But I call you Fox," she said.

"I am getting away from dirty pigs, is why I am in hurry."

She smirked. "So you're eithah a Jew or a troublemakah. Zhen zhis may be zhe place for you. Unless you're a Jew. Zhey get on my nerves."

"Hyrulian rule over police force is starting to get very tiring..."

She cackled. "Stahting? Zey vur tiring before zhey fucking got here, if you ask me. Me being Kazooie, zhat is."

[Fox McCloud]

"Pleasure to be meeting you, Kazooie."

Of course, he used "pleasure" somewhat... lightly. The anthro honestly had no idea about half of what the bird was going on about, and she didn't seem like the type of person really anyone would want to hang around. Maybe that was why her bag was in the middle of the alley, where any tresspasser could trip on it; maybe she wasn't expecting tresspassers.

Still...

"Fox is having... suggestion," Fox said carefully, not wanting to tread on any metaphorical toes. He swallowed, licking his lips. "Perhaps move home to... side of alley? Less chance of being tripped over, yes?"

[Kazooie]

"Vhy? Zis alley is 'ome," she answered, cocking her head to the side in confusion. "Backpack ist just bedroom. Zis Kazooie's alley. Kazooie doesn't get any company. All mine."

She nodded her head, confirming it. It wasn't much, but it was home. And she had not a care in the world. Though she had to admit, sometimes she missed when her 'bedroom' was on the back of a certain bear. Okay, she missed it alot. But those days were over. "I let you stay if you want. Just don't touch anything."

[Fox McCloud]

Fox shook his head.

"Thanking you," he murmured, eyes flashing genuine gratitude, "but Fox is having mate and little ones to be getting home to soon. Krystal will be worrying if Fox is being late." His tail swished politely, and his ears relaxed. He was trying to show her he was trusting, and meant no harm, in the only way an animal could.

He found it somewhat amusing, though, that she had proved him right about no one else coming through this alleyway. Perhaps she had scared them all away, or marked it in a way that he hadn't been able to notice in his rush, but now that he knew he was correct, he knew he would have to be wary of her.

If she was that scary...